Striving for Peace

"Don’t worry about anything: instead, pray for everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace which exceeds anything we can understand."
-Philippians 4:6

This pretty much sums up the whole IVF experience this time. As I mentioned before, I was pretty apathetic throughout this attempt. It seemed like many days I just went through the motions of shots, Dr. visits, blood work, etc. I just couldn't bring myself to get really emotionally involved. In fact, this time I did so much better in just handing it all to God. Honestly, I did exactly what Philippians says, I prayed for everything. The good, the bad and the ugly. I focused not just on me but on all the others I know who are struggling right now. I learned to "Let go, and Let God." And you know what, it worked. In return, I received incredible peace and we received results beyond anything we would have tried to imagine.

It is not to say that I wasn't stressed. Every time the lab called, I could feel my heart pounding and blood pressure rising expecting worse case scenario. And each time, I was given amazing news and peace that God continued to be in control. He taught me that he is much better at the control thing than I am (much to my dismay).

So it goes to say that when we showed up at the hospital for the transfer, I gave it all to Him again. I tried not to worry about it (unfortunately my heart rate and blood pressure gave me away) so they requested the embryologist come early so I could get some Valium. :) Honestly, this was the most terrifying moment for me. Learning the quality of our embryos produces a whole new level of stress normal parents never have to endure. We were soon comforted by the nurse and embryologist who walked in with 2 thumbs up.

We transferred two of the best looking embryos we've ever had. The lab rates them on a letter scale with A being the best and D being poor. They very rarely see any A rankings and if you recall last time we transferred a BCB and BBB. This time we transferred......ABB and BBB! We were told no less than 4 times by Dr. B and once by the head embryologist what great looking embryos we had. Dr. B. even said they were exactly like the example photos they use in the IVF training slide show we had to attend last year. We felt great at the results!

But it gets even better. Before we left the hospital on Tuesday, one of the embryologists poked his head in our room to tell us that they were going to go ahead a freeze 2 of the remaining embryos! I would have done a happy dance except I was on bed rest and I'm not supposed to get my heart rate up. We are absolutely THRILLED with the blessings God has bestowed on us.

We want to thank each of you for following our journey, loving and supporting us in the process, and praying for us. Please know how much it means to us to have a strong base of support. Also, thanks for all the comments on the last post. It was so much fun to see who all is reading. Keep it up!

Regardless of what happens next week, we will continue to trust in God's plan and be amazed at his faithfulness. Our God is an awesome God!

Good Things Come in Threes---Updated

We have the latest update from the embryologist. We have 3 excellent embryos, 3 good embryos, 3 average embryos, and 4 poor (or stragglers as the embryologist called them). Altogether we have nine good looking embryos. We are schedule for a transfer at noon on Tuesday and I will be on bedrest until Thursday afternoon (until I break down and must take a shower). We are pleased with the numbers and feel confident we will have some high quality embryos to transfer. Please pray with us that this is the case. As I told Joel at lunch, maybe this means triplets are in our future. I wish you all had see the look I got in return. :)

We started the progesterone shots yesterday and I already have bruise number one. I don't remember them hurting this much before but I'm sure I have just blocked out that memory. Otherwise, I'm feeling great. I wore "real" clothes yesterday and today for several hours. That was a huge accomplishment compared to the past when that wasn't possible for a least a week. I'm so thankful this time did not produce the hyperstimulation.

I will most likely not update again until bedrest is done. However, that does not mean you can't leave comments. In fact I'd love EVERYONE who stops by to comment. I'd love to show baby Cramer all the people who have prayed and cared for us. That is your challenge so hop to it!

Updated: We got a call from the lab this morning and have been bumped to 1:00 for the transfer. We will get to the hospital at noon. Otherwise, all else is the same. Keep the comments coming as I'm having so much fun seeing who all lurks. :)

Night and Day Difference

That is how I feel after yesterday. It is amazing how much better I feel compared to the last two times. I'm so thankful we don't have the extra worry of hyper stimulation this time.

Yesterday went well. We got 23 eggs and Dr. B. said they looked really good. He was pleased with the results and was glad he "finally figured me out". :) I felt good we hit our target and have not had to depend on the pain meds as much as previous experience.

I just talked to the embryologist this morning and got the embryo report. Of the 23 eggs they got, 19 were large enough to be fertilized with ICIS. Of those 19 we had 13 to fertilize normally. We will get our next report on Sunday which is when they will rate the embryos.

We are still scheduled for a day 5 transfer based on previous history but if that changes I'll let you know. Otherwise we will be back at the hospital on Tuesday and I'll be on bedrest till Thursday.

Please pray with us that our embryos continue to grow and divide properly and that they meet the highest rating. We want awesome looking babies! :) Thanks again and look for another update on Sunday.

Go Time

Sorry for the lack of blogging this week. I've been busy with appointments but have also been in a funk. I can't seem to really get excited about this latest round of IVF. That being said, I need to adjust my attitude before Thursday because that's the big day.

We are scheduled for retrieval Thursday morning around 7:30. We have hit our target on mature follicles as of today but I suspect there will be a few more ready by Thurs. I'm already feeling uncomfortable from the fluid but am nowhere near as miserable as in the past. Unfortunately, Dr. B's new facilities are not ready so we will be going back to Presby. I'm disappointed but feel at peace that God would not have brought us this far only to abandon us because of facilities.

I decided to keep this round of IVF as exciting as possible and so I created some DRAMA last week. I had training for school two days (really 1 1/2 days) so I had to do my shots in small bathroom stalls. On the second day, I must have decided that life had been too predictable so I dropped my vial of meds on the tile floor. Yup, shattered everywhere causing me to miss that dose (Note to self--Glass and tile don't mix). I quickly called the pharmacy (luckily I can do local pick up) to order more. I then made a frantic call to the nurse at Dr. B's office who reassured me that being 4 hrs late was not the end of the world as long as I took a dose ASAP. Needless to say, I got nothing from my training and rushed out of there to the pharmacy. Obviously it all worked out, but it sure was a stressful day!

So, as we prepare for Thursday, we continue to trust in the path God has carried us through. We hold strong to hope in the process, faith it will work and the love God has for us. Please continue to pray for us, our medical staff, the embryologists and our families.

Thank you all for the support and check back in after Thursday for the update on embryos.