Sunday, November 25, 2012

BFN

aka Big Fat Negative in the infertility world

aka We are not pregnant

Still not sure how I feel. I think it will take more time to sort out but for now here are some thoughts.

Frustration: why can't having a family come easy for once? Why is my body so dysfunctional? Just why in general.

Sadness: I really already grieved for this cycle the Friday we got a lousy report from the lab. I was hopeful after the transfer but seeing the embryos I knew they weren't anywhere near what they were for L's cycle.

Anger: not yet. I'm sure the next pregnancy announcement or next teen mom I see will trigger this.

Future: not sure what that looks like for us. All we know is we are taking a break until we get closer /back to TX. Adoption? Foster to adopt? IVF? Only child? only God knows.

Prayer requests: For peace, contentment, clarity for next steps

Please don't shy away from contacting me or asking questions but at the same time understand I may not be ready to talk. Thanks to you all for supporting us. Much love!


2 comments:

Jennifer said...

Hey, Abbey. I'm so sorry this wasn't the time for you to conceive. Please know we are thinking about you and praying for you.

Heather said...

Wow... you know, God works in amazing, crazy, mysterious ways. I just clicked on the 'Next Blog' link at the top of my screen and found your blog. Why am I even posting a comment about this? Because I could have written your blog inside and out. I'm an infertility survivor too.

So, I will pray for you, my unknown friend, for God's guidance through your journey. No matter what happens, He will never forsake you, never leave you, never fail you.